By Adam Bisby, the greatest globe-trotting, child-wrangling, season-pushing and hyphen-abusing freelance journalist in Toronto's M6R postal code.
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WHAT DOES THE 'GT' STAND FOR IN GT SNOWRACER?

1/28/2019

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After years of bitter disappointment, my daughter Grace finally received a GT Snowracer from Santa this past Christmas. Then, after weeks of bitter disappointment, there was finally enough snow on the ground this weekend to use the sweet steerable sled.

Grace was fired up, but only slightly more fired up than I was. After all, I loved my 1980s Snowracer even more than I adored my Green Machine. The GT has got to be one of the most enduringly popular winter toys of all time. Since its invention in the early 1970s, the Snowracer's manufacturer, Stiga, has gone on to produce SX Pro models with BMX-style handlebars for more extreme sledding. 

The GT model is the classic, however, and as I watched Grace and her buddies hurtle down the short-but-steep slope at Toronto's Rennie Park it occurred to me that I have no idea what "GT" actually stands for. A quick Wikipedia search reveals that the acronym typically means "grand touring" in the automotive industry, with GT models offering higher-performance engines and more comfortable interiors designed for long trips.

But with its hard plastic seat and gravity-based propulsion system, this doesn't really apply to the Snowracer. So, with Stiga ignoring my voice mails, emails and sky writing, I've developed a few theories as to the origin of the Snowracer's initials:

Golden Trousers: Swedish engineer Erland "Golden Trousers" Wikner is credited with having invented the Snowracer.

Guaranteed Terror: What you get when you put a nine-year-old on a Snowracer and send it down a snowy hill teeming with approximately 400 other excited kids.

G&T: What daddy needs after an afternoon of snowracing.

Generous THC: What daddy needs after an afternoon of snowracing.

Gaaah-Thunk​: The sound of two Snowracers colliding (and their warranties being simultaneously voided).

Grace Tolja: Like when Grace said, "I tolja Santa knows how to make fast toys!"

.gt: The Internet country code top-level domain for Guatemala.

Good Thing: As in, "Good thing for the brake, or that sled would be in Scarborough by now."

Giggle at Toronto: What the rest of Canada does whenever it snows enough to actually use a Snowracer here.

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EPIC HOCKEY COMEBACKS AND METEOR FIREBALLS, TOGETHER AT LAST

11/29/2018

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PictureLast night's meteor can be seen at the top of this image captured by the CN Tower's EarthCam.
The Bisby clan was in high spirits last night after witnessing a stirring third-period comeback by the Intelliware Warriors, who earned their first point of the Swansea Girls Hockey League season.

Grace, our nine-year-old Mitch Marner wannabe, was pleased to have registered her first shot on goal (and 47th cross-check). Her big sister Ava was pleased that we were on our way to her favourite coffee shop for hot chocolate. Angela and I were pleased to have avoided both frostbite and SGHL disciplinary action while watching the outdoor game.
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As we drove north from Rennie Park Ice Rink, a sudden flash of greenish light illuminated the clear night sky ahead of us. At first I thought it was a distressed aircraft, but its blazing speed instantly put paid to that theory. Milliseconds after we spotted it, the fiery object seemed to splinter before disappearing behind the storefronts lining Bloor Street West.

The next morning I checked Twitter, and lo and behold, dozens of others had also seen (and reported) the 9:15pm light show.

Then I clicked over to GlobeandMail.com, and lo and behold, my Travel story on winter stargazing had just been posted. In fact, it was posted at almost exactly the same time as the meteor’s spectacular demise.

That, my friends, is what keeps me showing up for work every other afternoon.


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MY FAVOURITE BITS OF TORONTO'S NEW BANKSY EXHIBIT

6/12/2018

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I've got a terrifying number of deadlines hanging over my head today, but because I live to serve my tens and tens of readers, and because I'm a fan, and because it's a six-minute walk from my house, I STILL went to the media preview of "The Art of Banksy," which opens tonight.

Again, the deadlines, so I'll be brief. If you're thinking of shelling out $44.30 (all-in) for the show, which features 80 original works and is apparently the world’s largest collection of Banksy’s art ever exhibited, I'll offer some single-word insight. Is it worth going? Yes. Does it feel a tad opportunistic? Yes. Is it all rather ironic given the nature of Banksy's work? Yes. 

I hope that helps. If not, check out the photos I've assembled above, which of course are all over the Internet, and ask yourself: Regardless of how opportunistic and ironic the exhibition might be, would I like to see much of Banksy's best work assembled in one air-conditioned place in a smart, stylish, insightful way? If the answer is "yes," I encourage you to go.

But please don't knock on my door on your way there, as I won't answer, and might have to release the hounds. 
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11 places that make Toronto great

4/24/2018

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​When tragedy strikes cities around the world — in recent years in Paris, Nice, Miami, London, Las Vegas, and in far too many others — my first instinct is to make a B-line for them. I suppose part of me wants to make sure that tragedy hasn’t dimmed their lustre. Thankfully, the healing process always makes cities stronger, and I have no doubt this will be the case with Toronto, my home for more than 20 years.

Of course, since I’m already here, Toronto’s enduring greatness surrounds me every day. And IMHO, these 11 spots are where it shines the brightest:

Toronto Islands Park
A 15-minutes ferry ride from the foot of Bay St., the car-free and bike-friendly Islands feel like a faraway slice of cottage country. I’m especially fond of Ward’s Island, home to one of Toronto’s finest stretches of sand, the bucolic Island Cafe, arguably the best disc-golf course in Canada — E.T. Seton Park also has a superb track — and a community of whimsical cottages that’s straight out of a Tim Burton flick. Plus, few places are better for admiring the stunning downtown skyline.

St. Lawrence Market
I love visiting this massive covered foodie paradise on weekdays in the early afternoon, and making a meal of sampling the wares at the scores of vendors spread over the market’s two floors.

Horseshoe Tavern
I’m very proud of the fact that I’ve taken the stage in the same checkerboard-floored venue celebrated in the Tragically Hip’s “Bobcaygeon.” The ‘Shoe, along with spots like Massey Hall, Lee’s Palace and the Opera House, make Toronto the ultimate Canadian destination for live-music fans.

Hockey Hall of Fame
This 57,000-square-foot shrine features 15 exhibit areas cover everything from a vintage replica of the Montreal Canadiens' dressing room to an interactive area where you can snap pucks at a computer simulation of goalie Ed Belfour. My only quibble: Why isn’t an entire wing devoted to the Calgary Flames?

Canada’s Wonderland
I have a thing for roller coasters, and the country’s largest theme park has the Western Hemisphere’s greatest variety of them. There’s Leviathan, Wonderland’s tallest, and Vortex, Canada’s first suspended roller coaster. To quote a visiting cousin: “Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!”

Royal Ontario Museum
I’m not really a museum person, but the ROM wins me over every time. Behind its trippy "Michael Lee-Chin Crystal" façade more than six million items are housed in 40 galleries, with world-class collections showcasing dinosaurs, Near Eastern, African and East Asian art, and European and Canadian history.

The Scarborough Bluffs
This 14-km-long sedimentary escarpment provides a dramatic backdrop for more of Toronto's best beaches, a network of marsh-crossing boardwalks, and an expansive marina that’s home to fishing charters that gave me an afternoon of salmon fishing I’ll never forget.

Kensington Market
Just west of Chinatown, this warren of streets takes its neighbour’s ethnic energy and adds a dose of bohemian style. Ramshackle storefronts house everything from vintage clothing boutiques to taco joints, while street performers swallow swords and do their best Dylan impressions for passers-by.

Distillery District
This collection of brick heritage buildings and cobblestone streets is transformed into a festive wonderland in December, and in summer practically overflows with outdoor patios. The Mill Street Brew Pub, for instance, pours more than a dozen house beers.

Ripley's Aquarium of Canada
For aquarium enthusiasts such as myself, it doesn’t get much better than the shark-filled “Dangerous Lagoon.” The 2.5-million-litre display is home to scores of the 450 water-dwelling species that call Ripley's home, and can be viewed from below via a glass-domed moving sidewalk that’s the longest of its kind in North America.  

High Park Zoo
Toronto is home to Canada’s largest zoo — which is fantastic — and this isn’t even remotely it. But set as it is in the city proper’s largest and best-equipped park, this free-admission menagerie is charming in its own modest way...kind of like Toronto in general.
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An open letter to Gary, God of Freezing Rain

4/14/2018

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Dear Gary,

You may remember me from the ice storm of 1998, when I transported a rented generator from unaffected Toronto to my parents' place in hard-hit Kingston. I've never been in a war zone, but darkened K-Town sure looked like one as my ancient, tank-like Volvo swerved to avoid innumerable fallen tree branches and power lines.

Based on the forecast that’s been terrifying Ontarians all week, it looks like we will meet again very soon. But I sincerely hope we don’t, mainly because you seem like a total dick.

Why can’t you be more like your brother Nigel, God of Snow? That usually awesome dude just helped me out big-time in Fernie and Whistler. I’m not Nigel’s biggest fan when I’m stuck in an airport or driving at night, but unlike you I think he means well.

Just face it: Nobody likes you! The only exception might be the photographers who capture the icy splendour of your evil powers. But even then you come across like a jerk by forcing them to scrape off their windshields, and then making them slip and fall on their driveways.

So let’s make a deal: We puny mortals will stop taking your name in vain if you agree to unleash your powers on weekdays only. A few ice-storm days would make up for the lack of legitimate snow days this winter, and might even earn you a few worshipers.

So just hold off till Monday, OK? I’ve got a morning meeting I’d love you to freezing-rain on.

Sincerely,

Adam

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Male moral support: Sportfishing in Lake Ontario

10/4/2017

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Divorces happen. Injuries and illnesses happen. Sometimes, through no fault of their own, buddies become Vancouver Canucks fans. That’s why it’s so important for friends to step up and remind the affected parties that life is actually awesome.

Take my longtime amigo Matt: We could tell he was down in the dumps over the recent sale of his beloved Muskoka cottage. And for good reason: His family built the gorgeous lakefront property and enjoyed it for decades. My own family and our mutual friends, meanwhile, were invited up frequently.

My buds and I wanted to cheer Matt up and thank him for all the good times. But how? The best approach, we reasoned, was to do something he loved doing at the cottage, but that blew the cottage experience away. “You don’t need the cottage to have a wicked time doing (blank),” was how we saw it. Trouble was, cliff-jumping, waterfall-sliding, poker-playing and dockside cigadoobs really don’t get any better than they do at the cottage.

We couldn’t go for something mediocre. That might make Matt’s blues even worse. Whatever we did, it had to be off the hook.

Off the hook...that’s when it hit us: Matt loves to fish at the cottage, and the salmon fishing in Lake Ontario, we had heard, is epic.

These segues write themselves: After making a few enquiries, we settled on an afternoon with Epic Sportfishing. Based in Scarborough’s picturesque Bluffer’s Park Marina, captain Aaron Flavell and his 30-foot SeaRay power cruiser seemed like the perfect fit for our group of four.

A perfect fit for three of us at least. While my companions were experienced anglers, I hadn’t fished seriously for years. That’s why it came as such a relief that WE DIDN’T HAVE TO DO A DAMN THING OTHER THAN HAUL IN MASSIVE FISH.

With six lines in the water, blue skies overhead and first mate Bill manning both the wheel and the sonar-powered fish-finder, our spirits were high as we motored away from shore. And they got even higher when a spinning reel interrupted Aaron’s introductory remarks.

“You guys lucked out. For October, the fishing is amazing,” he said, adding that the unseasonably warm fall weather and lake temperatures have extended the salmon season like never before. “So, over here you’ve got your...Whoa! There's one on! Who’s up?”

Naturally, the first bobbing rod was handed to Matt, who promptly reeled in a gleaming eight-pound Chinook. And so it went: For the next three hours, we took turns pulling in salmon after salmon, with yours truly winning a battle with an enormous rainbow trout that’s in the smoker as I type.

Lulls in the action were few and far between — we threw back more than we kept — and just as the sun was setting spectacularly behind the distant CN Tower we reached our 15-fish limit.

“Cottage? What cottage!?!” someone hollered as our cans of (completely non-alcoholic!) beer collided overhead and Aaron displayed his on-board filleting mastery.

Did all this make Matt forget about his cottage? Certainly not. But at least, I think we reminded him that there are other, much bigger fish in another, much bigger lake.

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HOW TO JAZZ UP YOUR JOE THIS NATIONAL COFFEE DAY

9/29/2017

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As he fills a trio of glasses, Alex Castellani notes the aromas of blackcurrant, citrus and tamarind rising from the burgundy liquid.

But this is no wine tasting. The Boxcar Social co-owner is preparing a flight of lightly roasted coffees – an Ethiopian Borboya, Honduran Vallecillo and Kenyan Karinga – which is still several minutes away from being sampled at the seven-month-old café in Toronto's Summerhill neighbourhood.

The "pour-over" brewing method can't be rushed, Castellani explains, as he dribbles 96-degree water into steel drippers atop three glass carafes. The carafes, in turn, sit on digital scales that also track the time that has elapsed since the process began. This data, along with measurements of total dissolved solids – that is, the strength of the brew – are displayed on a bar-top iPad.

This elaborate, technical and time-consuming coffee experience is very different from the grab-and-go approach familiar to most Canadians. Yet it's being echoed in one form or another across the country.

From downtown Victoria's Hey Happy to Anchored Coffee in Dartmouth, N.S., dozens of boutique roasters and cafés are encouraging customers to drink curated coffees in much the same way as a wine connoisseur sips a fine vintage. Like Boxcar Social, most recommend that their offerings be taken black, with modern garnishes such as syrups, sprinkles and foams eschewed in favour of pure, unadulterated beans."We're not here to make people drink coffee a certain way, but ours are curated to be black," Castellani says, adding that staff "won't scoff if a customer orders a vanilla latte. We want to make sure our coffee program is spectacular, unique, challenging and cerebral, but at the same time, accessible."
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Phil Robertson, co-founder of Phil & Sebastian Coffee Roasters in Calgary, compares coffee garnishes to ketchup. "When we add ketchup to food, it changes and conceals the flavour. Remove the ketchup – or in coffee's case, the cream and sugar – and you can taste the nuances."
The company roasts its beans lightly for the same reason. "People assume that dark roasts mean higher quality," Robertson says, adding that "corporate vendors" such as Starbucks, Tim Hortons and McDonald's base many of their offerings on this perception. "But in reality, this actually strips away a lot of the flavours."

READ THE REST OF THE STORY IN THE GLOBE AND MAIL

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WET 'N' WILD IS A WELCOME ADDITION TO WATERPARK-CHALLENGED TORONTO

7/7/2017

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How much wetness and/or wildness does $25 million get you? That’s the amount Oklahoma-based Premier Parks spent on upgrading the former Wild Water Kingdom in Brampton.

The answer: A lot. In addition to renaming and revamping its three blackout rides and two high-speed slides — both of which deliver seven-storey drops — the recently reopened and renamed Wet ‘N’ Wild Toronto has added a host of new pools and rides.

The towering “Bear Footin' Bay” play structure, for instance, is festooned with sprayers, slides and a giant tipping bucket. My daughters were nimble enough to avoid being soaked by the latter, and could not have been happier when my own nimbleness fell short. However, their gleeful mockery would only sweeten my inevitable revenge.

This watery intro also primed us for "Hurricane" and "Typhoon," a pair of tandem-tube slides that quickened our pulses and whetted our appetites for two of the main attractions: "Krazy Kanuck" and "Caribbean Chaos," which rise together over the former site of a mini-golf course.

Krazy Kanuck was relatively tame, taking as many as five inner-tube riders down back-to-back curves, drops and vortex loops. We tried it a few times, and soon determined that whizzing down backwards increased the fear factor substantially.

Once the girls had built up their nerve, we took the other staircase up to Caribbean Chaos. This slide builds anticipation with an enormous scream-reflecting wall that looms over the entrance to the waterpark. It proved to be just as thrilling as it looked, especially for my daughters who, at my subtle request, were sent down backwards by the ride attendant. As we rocketed up the watery wall and felt gravity loosen its grip, their wide eyes and delighted screams made me grin triumphantly. Revenge was sweet indeed!

A few of the new attractions were still under construction during our visit: Oh Canada!, a free-fall slide with a 360-degree loop; and Klondike Express, side-by-side racing tunnels that loop and drop. The new Wet 'n' Wild Jr. play area, meanwhile, was shunned as being “for babies,” although I did like the look of the shady deck chairs. Thankfully, dozens more were arrayed around the half-million-gallon "Big Surf" wave pool, which is surrounded by the "Muskoka Soakah" lazy river. 

​For GTA-based families who want to combine watery refreshment with watery excitement, Wet ‘N’ Wild fits the bill nicely as the only good-sized standalone waterpark in the area. Just remember to beware the bucket!

WHERE TO STAY
The new Courtyard Toronto Mississauga/West is less than 15 minutes by car from Wet 'N' Wild, and features a full-service restaurant and lounge where you can refuel post-waterpark.

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CANADA 150 COUNTDOWN: TORONTO ISLANDS

5/31/2017

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Travel elicits many emotions, from awe to anger and from upgrade ecstasy to gift-shop remorse. But over the course of my Canadian wanderings, there’s something more: Pride. That's what this 30-part series is all about: Sharing my proud perspective on the 30 places and experiences that make my country the greatest on Earth. Some of my daily selections are world-famous, others are little-known, and a few are acquired tastes. My first one, however, begins with a plea:
 
Please, Mother Nature, lay off the Toronto Islands for a while, OK?
 
Some of the best features of the city's best feature are struggling. With recent flooding restricting ferry access, the Island Cafe has laid off staff. Even worse, the nearby Rectory Cafe has revealed that it is shutting down after this season owing to financial trouble brought about by the rising waters.
 
The good news: There’s nothing stopping you from enjoying a pitcher of sangria on the Island Cafe’s airy patio, or a Wellington County striploin on the Rectory’s leafy terrace. While ferries to Centre Island and Hanlan’s Point have suspended operations until at least June 30, the Ward’s Island ferry is still running. Service is limited to “residents and their guests, staff, and emergency personnel,” according to the City of Toronto, but this is easily circumvented in three ways: One, take a water taxi. Two, simply tell ferry staff that you are dining at either spot and you will be allowed to board. Three, paddle over yourself, as I did just last week. As you can see from the top photo, the flooding is striking and worth checking out. Does it hinder the dining experience? Not at all.
 
Supporting these wonderful eateries in tough times is far from the only reason to explore the Islands. Let me ask you this: How far from downtown Toronto is the bucolic waterway pictured above? Two hours by car (or five on a summer Friday)? Fifty minutes by float plane? Believe it or not, this verdant, mellow spot on Ward’s is less than 20 minutes by ferry from the foot of Bay Street.
 
I’ve learned a lot about the quirky archipelago since I first visited more than 20 years ago. Did you know, for instance, that Babe Ruth hit his first professional home run out of Hanlan's Point Stadium in 1914? But my Island education hasn’t been limited to T.O. trivia. Here are six key lessons I’ve learned:
 
They are Hogtown's hidden gem
It amazes me how many Torontonians say they have never visited the Islands, or have only ever checked out the fun and kitschy Centreville Amusement Park or the clothing-optional Hanlan's Point Beach. After all, there’s so much more to the place than bumper-boats and CN Tower-themed thongs. With leafy pedestrian laneways and adorably rustic homes, Ward’s and Algonquin islands are like little slices of Ontario cottage country — but with some striking differences…
 
Downtown shines from the lake
The northern shores offer unparalleled, unobstructed views of the Toronto skyline. On warm evenings my family often carries a cooler to one of the picnic tables lining Algonquin’s leafy shore to revel in the surreal proximity of the concrete, glass and steel jungle. From the Gardiner Expressway it can seem dystopian. From the islands, it looks like Emerald City.
 
Deluxe digs on the doorstep
B&Bs and cottage rentals are the only overnight options on the Islands. But with the Westin Harbour Castle practically on top of the mainland ferry dock, all the comforts and amenities of a luxury hotel — including perks such as free Wi-Fi for Marriott Rewards members — are just a ferry ride, water-taxi fare or canoe rental away.
 
No cars, no stress
Being almost entirely free of motorized vehicles, the Islands are bicycle-centric and perfect for young kids like mine. Every time I climb in the car to drive home from the mainland ferry dock, I am reminded of how nice it is to eschew internal combustion engines for even a few hours.
 
Free (disc) golf!
Ward’s is home to one of the world’s premier disc golf courses, a 6,925-foot, 18-basket stretch of bucolic parkland. It hosted the Professional Disc Golf Association’s World Championships back in 1986 — six years after the course was established — and each July hosts the pro-am Toronto Island Open. Let’s hope waters subside enough for the event to take place this year.
 
Ward's Beach rules
The clean, compact and uncrowded stretch of sand on the south side of Ward's is arguably the city's finest, especially for families. The ferry dock is a five-minute walk away, lifeguards abound, toilets are mere steps away, and you gaze out onto nothing but Lake Ontario, the parkland of the adjacent Leslie Spit, and boats that are either passing or anchored in the small bay. Again, fingers crossed that full beach operations resume soon.

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March Break Hacks, Part 1: The Airport Hotel

3/13/2017

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“Daddy, can we stay here for the rest of March Break?”

This question from my seven-year-old confirmed it: Kicking off the annual scholastic interlude with a sleepover at the Hilton Garden Inn Toronto Airport West Mississauga — that’s right, it’s in all four places at once! — was a strong, if unorthodox, move.

Over March Break, families frequently end up at airport hotels because their flights to beaches or ski hills have been delayed by the foul weather they’re desperate to escape. That’s not irony, even in an Alanis Morissette sense, but it’s definitely a kick in the seasonally inappropriate board shorts. Trust me, I’ve been there and done that.

Now don’t get me wrong: I would like nothing more than to be in Punta Cana or Park City right now. But I simply can’t abide (or afford) the ridiculous March Break price markups. So to any family in the same metaphorical boat, I say: Eschew expensive faraway getaways and try a quasi-staycation.

I say “quasi” because, technically, a staycation involves staying in your own home. But this fails to take advantage of the Top 5 Hotel Amenities Every Kid Loves:

  1. A pool and hot tub.
  2. Two queen beds side-by-each. My kids jumped from one to the other approximately 93,000 times. Plus, our room featured a nifty alcove that allowed my wife and I to watch, heckle and ignore them from the comfort of a couch.
  3. Key cards. You would think the “magic” of opening your room door with a card would wear off after awhile. But you would be mistaken.
  4. The ice machine. Pro tip: Check your pockets for cubes before you check out.
  5. The vending machine. The coin-op at school is full of Tofu Tubz and Kale Krunchies. The hotel machine? Not so much.

Likewise, a local overnight embraces the Top 5 Hotel Attributes Every Parent Loves:

  1. Housekeeping.
  2. A pool, a hot tub, and a sleeve of red cups.
  3. A breakfast buffet. The Hilton Garden Inn’s was exceptional, what with the made-to-order omelettes and non-judgemental waffle policy.
  4. Housekeeping.
  5. Room service. Those red cups weren’t going to fill themselves, and “we” forgot a corkscrew. Thankfully, it was just a front-desk phone call away.

How much will an outing of this sort set you back? Compared to a week in Punta Cana — which starts at around $300 a night per person over Ontario March Break — the Hilton Garden Inn is $129 a night for the entire crew. Break up the week with a couple nights at a nearby airport hotel — it’ll be empty, as it’s probably in the deserted ‘burbs — and you can put the substantial savings toward a family vacation when you’re not being gouged.

Now if you'll excuse me, the keyboard is sticky and my waffle tower is getting cold...

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